Jew Living in Thornhill Parents Basement Remains Content

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THORNHILL,ON — 35 year old Moshe Goldberg is still living in his parents basement and has no plans to move any time soon. “The basement has everything I need!” Exclaims Moshe. “I have a living room, two bedrooms, and a bathroom. It’s over 1,000 square feet. PLUS, it has its own private entrance, so it’s really like my very own place!” Thornhill might be a bit out of the way for some people, but not Moshe. “Is it the most convenient location? No.” Moshe admits. “But you know what IS convenient? Having my own personal chef right upstairs. Plus, I can borrow my parents extra Lexus any time I want, so getting around is easy.” “I just don’t understand why I would leave. Why would I wanna pay $400,000 to live in a shoe box downtown? Not to mention with all the money I’m saving on rent, I can use all my earnings as a stock boy at Sobey’s on whatever I want! All you can eat sushi, EDM festivals, open bar Jewish fundraisers. The world is my oyster! Oh, also, I buy so many oysters!”

Article by: Andrew Barr and Ronen Geisler

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